Okay okay lack of sleep=very odd hours, been having a consistent headache and been feeling pretty lightheaded - for perhaps reasons of not eating. Over this weekend, I was at the NYAF, and it was a fabulous weekend, unfortunately once t he time is over, and things start to go at normal speeds again. I wonder if I can catch up or not.

A lot of people would probably say I think too much on things, but that is my personality type. I overly worry and stress. And the thing is that either you go to therapy and waste your time talking, or you go and talk with a friend, and that firend will eventually not be your friend.. ans so most times my worries stew.

Currently I finish my report after two days, and had a series of unfortunate misunderstandings.. and yes my fault. I have this bad issue of communication, and at times I expect people to know what I am talking about. Otherwise it'll take a long time for me to explain it and by that time people will want to move somewhere else.

Perhaps things will be slightly better as times goes on, and normal things occur. I really fear stepping on people's toes.. >_<

As the semester is going underway with the my photography class, like all the other classes I have ever taken - there is excitement, I will try to stay positive, but there is a reason why I am never that good in art class. My mental perfectionism streak goes on haywire, and I end up sabotaging my own attempts. Yes, I want to learn how to use my digital camera proficiency, but at times I really doubt my ability. Crash coursing through my camera, yes..

On times will be using my Flickr account to put up some images I have taken.

There are still lots of things to learn, and yes I will conquer them! Now to get more external hard drives for backups. Also to go and take some more pictures.

The textbook this semester I am using is Digital Photography 2nd ed by Katrin Eismann et al. So far am about 2 chapters behind. Need to catch up sooner or later.

Also was able to borrow another book that was on the professor's recommended list - The Education of a Photographer Edited by Charles H. Traub et al.

Personally I feel so sore at the moment, not sure why, but my joints are pretty much hurting these days.. I need to stop feel so stressed out, but it is a tightrope.. ugh.. today I went with my mom and sister to the Top of the Rock.. and yes that was fun.. even though my mom drove me bananas with her photography demands. I was also going to take some pictures for my homework. Also need to prepare for NYAF which is next weekend.

Oh I found out about something, my mom actually wrote poems for one of her Creative Writing ESL class several years ago, and they're pretty good. Mind you - I do not really read that much poetry, and yes my mom is pretty weak in her third language, but to just see the fact that she wrote this.. made me feel really proud of her. I learned some few things new about my mom through her poems..

So I want to be able to archive this.

If Only..

Roses

in the vase
red, pink, and yellow
beautiful smelling
like a perfume
How long will they smell good?

Love and Hate

I love to travel.
I love to be happy.
I love to play guitar.
I love learning English.
I love God
I love my health.
I love to do exercise.
I love my family.
I love America.
I would love to find a real friend.

I hate to see people drinking alcohol.
I hate the winter time.
I hate to complain to my landlord because he does not listen.
I hate the war.
I hate when someone kills another.
I hate someone who abuses another.
I hate someone who steals.
I hate the landlord collecting the rent at 7:30 in the morning.

Past Present Future

I was born and lived in Panama.
I now live in New York City.
I will live in San Francisco in the future.

I worked hard for may years.
Now I relax.
I will travel to China.

I was once skinny.
I am now fat.
I will be skinny.

The language is pretty simple, but to my mom who's never as expressive... yep I see her hopes and dreams. It is a dream of mine to see her live her life as satisfying as one can get, even though life is going pretty fast.