anime_miz's Xanga

Ugh.. one of those nights and days and nights..

Sun, 01 Nov 2009 22:06:26 GMT

What a loss.. wasted an entire afternoon prepping and laminating.. and nothing. Oh and I also can't believe this, but let's just say if you're the owner of a cat, and maybe dog, how fast you can lose your innocence whenever they find vermin's. Tommy has been staking out the kitchen for a while now, seeking for a rodent, of course he had stopped presenting the dead corpses to me, when I believe he thinks I don't appreciate him for his talent, but yep so today I stepped in the kitchen, lo and behold... Tommy had a probably dried out mouse in his mouth.. I quickly caught my cat by the scruff of his neck, and he dropped it. So I quickly whisked the corpse away and ran downstairs to throw it with the next day's garbage collection. If other alley cats smell the mouse corpse, then woe to them. Who knows what might have the rodent ingested that killed it.

The issue though now is that my cat is right now seeking the darn thing to no ail, unless there are others, but I pretty much stopped screaming, and this may signal a loss of innocence. Typically girls should probably be afraid of rodents, but pretty much with a cat.. you grow quite numb and disassociated yourself to those things, that should have people screaming "eek" to.

Hmm.. trying to figure out.

Sun, 25 Oct 2009 19:59:07 GMT

Okay with the fluctuations of the U.S. currency, what happens if someone gives you in an exchange of cash for coins after a sale. You discover that you were given a Canadian Penny on the premises that it would be the U.S. penny? So the dilenma now is.. what the heck do you do with a Canadian Penny, when people obviously won't even use it on this side of the boarder?

So that is one of my current dilemmas, as I order take out for dinner tonight. I was cheated yes when I received that Canadian Penny, but should I pass the fraud penny the delivery guy when I give him all of the loose change I have? I hoard a lot of lose change, and yes with barely any cash, there is lots of loose change, so now what? Ugh must try to pass off that penny though, so then I must and will!

Coming to some realizations.. overqualifications ponderings..

Tue, 20 Oct 2009 01:23:27 GMT

Well I sent off some applications here and there, and yes, have been stressing more and more about dwindling funds. So yes, in the process of trying to save more money. Will be a trial that is for sure.

Was reading this blog entry from Peter Payne, and trying to not over think things. Japan will be there.. japan will be there.. Am still trying to think of another masters positively, without thinking of the $20K+ into the hole I will be in, and of the over qualification argument, that would probably occur.

What a day..

Mon, 19 Oct 2009 03:05:11 GMT

Okay so I didn't get to bed until 5:30AM this morning, woke up late for the Tezuka Day at Kino. Cursed the MTA for their weekend transit schedule. Makes me cry for the Japanese system some more. What a nuisance. So went and heard the last end of Vertical Pub's panel. Then I quickly found Black Lagoon vol 8 and the DVD set.. snatched those up of course. Then went to Bookoff, also purchased some things. Then went to Duets 48, where some friends of mine are. Made several new friends, unfortunately because of the weekend, and the timing, ended up seeing most of them leave, since they were in NYC since Friday. Took a Sunday night tourist run to Ground Zero.. and while yes the location was pretty windy - saw it as it what is was. A construction site where a building came down. Took my friend back up to 34th Street, where she caught the train back up to Queens, and I went back down to Brooklyn. Ah what a night, also came home to leftovers from yesterday's banquet. There was so much leftovers at my table, that my mom brought home a majority from our table. Oh this morning, found out what a thoughtful banquet favor was, a wine stopper.

I need to go and fix the photos sooner or later. I cannot for the life of me concentrate on editing photos when I am in class. It is pretty annoying, never was able to fully concentrate whenever I am at a computer class, or where there is a public setting. Wish I was able to blast music in my ears, so that I can do that. Seems rude to even ask the professor that, so I guess I will have to concentrate then. I will most likely need to lug my laptop since, I am still trying to fix the weekend's banquet shots, and an additional today's shots as well.

Oh and my budget went flying out the window today.. >_< How will I ever save money up!

What a night.. and some thoughts.

Sun, 18 Oct 2009 06:04:01 GMT

Everyone's life is different, and as of now.. I see my life in a cross road of some sorts. So many opportunities, and chance.. what to do this, should I go in this directions or not?

The recession is plaguing heavily on my mind, because of the lost opportunities, plus with the ideas of success, that has colored my perspective from time before.

I went to a wedding a few hours ago. I am very happy for my friend the bride.. but that is also another path, should I or shouldn't I think about?

I want to be able to go to Japan before I get too old. Unfortunately, I recently broke a chain of events, that would have been better for me in terms of usefulness for Japan. Trying to catch onto that dream is hard. I have this issue of changing everything at the very last minute.. trying not to say woe is me.. but swallowing a bitter pill, as I rush into my dream is a harder thing to grasp. If I go within the year, then would I be giving up a career then?

Is it hard to grasp the change then?

What a weekend and night..

Wed, 30 Sep 2009 20:46:38 GMT

Okay okay lack of sleep=very odd hours, been having a consistent headache and been feeling pretty lightheaded - for perhaps reasons of not eating. Over this weekend, I was at the NYAF, and it was a fabulous weekend, unfortunately once t he time is over, and things start to go at normal speeds again. I wonder if I can catch up or not.

A lot of people would probably say I think too much on things, but that is my personality type. I overly worry and stress. And the thing is that either you go to therapy and waste your time talking, or you go and talk with a friend, and that firend will eventually not be your friend.. ans so most times my worries stew.

Currently I finish my report after two days, and had a series of unfortunate misunderstandings.. and yes my fault. I have this bad issue of communication, and at times I expect people to know what I am talking about. Otherwise it'll take a long time for me to explain it and by that time people will want to move somewhere else.

Perhaps things will be slightly better as times goes on, and normal things occur. I really fear stepping on people's toes.. >_<

Busy day... busy night..

Wed, 23 Sep 2009 01:26:41 GMT

Well I went out with my mom today to B&H. She was pretty impressed with the store.. and I added some more items on my mental wishlist to get. I did get a new camera bag today, so that will be coming with me to NYAF this upcoming weekend.

Kinda rushing on writing a review, and multitasking all at once.. >_<

Still trying to figure out what to do with taking some pictures, and will be lugging this laptop with me to school tomorrow. Yay.. I am so happy that I have to lug my camera, and my laptop tomorrow with me. >_<

Photography thoughts..

Tue, 22 Sep 2009 03:34:21 GMT

As the semester is going underway with the my photography class, like all the other classes I have ever taken - there is excitement, I will try to stay positive, but there is a reason why I am never that good in art class. My mental perfectionism streak goes on haywire, and I end up sabotaging my own attempts. Yes, I want to learn how to use my digital camera proficiency, but at times I really doubt my ability. Crash coursing through my camera, yes..

On times will be using my Flickr account to put up some images I have taken.

There are still lots of things to learn, and yes I will conquer them! Now to get more external hard drives for backups. Also to go and take some more pictures.

The textbook this semester I am using is Digital Photography 2nd ed by Katrin Eismann et al. So far am about 2 chapters behind. Need to catch up sooner or later.

Also was able to borrow another book that was on the professor's recommended list - The Education of a Photographer Edited by Charles H. Traub et al.

.......

Mon, 21 Sep 2009 00:26:42 GMT

Emmy - silly..

Last weekend of summer, and still so out of it.. got to get into the grove of the Fall...

Hopefully won't get so out of learning Japanese..

Tired.. and something very surprsing..

Sun, 20 Sep 2009 02:47:15 GMT

Personally I feel so sore at the moment, not sure why, but my joints are pretty much hurting these days.. I need to stop feel so stressed out, but it is a tightrope.. ugh.. today I went with my mom and sister to the Top of the Rock.. and yes that was fun.. even though my mom drove me bananas with her photography demands. I was also going to take some pictures for my homework. Also need to prepare for NYAF which is next weekend.

Oh I found out about something, my mom actually wrote poems for one of her Creative Writing ESL class several years ago, and they're pretty good. Mind you - I do not really read that much poetry, and yes my mom is pretty weak in her third language, but to just see the fact that she wrote this.. made me feel really proud of her. I learned some few things new about my mom through her poems..

So I want to be able to archive this.

If Only..

Roses

in the vase
red, pink, and yellow
beautiful smelling
like a perfume
How long will they smell good?

Love and Hate

I love to travel.
I love to be happy.
I love to play guitar.
I love learning English.
I love God
I love my health.
I love to do exercise.
I love my family.
I love America.
I would love to find a real friend.

I hate to see people drinking alcohol.
I hate the winter time.
I hate to complain to my landlord because he does not listen.
I hate the war.
I hate when someone kills another.
I hate someone who abuses another.
I hate someone who steals.
I hate the landlord collecting the rent at 7:30 in the morning.

Past Present Future

I was born and lived in Panama.
I now live in New York City.
I will live in San Francisco in the future.

I worked hard for may years.
Now I relax.
I will travel to China.

I was once skinny.
I am now fat.
I will be skinny.

The language is pretty simple, but to my mom who's never as expressive... yep I see her hopes and dreams. It is a dream of mine to see her live her life as satisfying as one can get, even though life is going pretty fast.